Five Times Eli Tries to Propose
by only here in your arms
Summary: ...and the time he finally succeeds. ONE SHOT


**Okay, some of this story is just for story purposes. Like the first part of this, where Clare decides to go, it's for story purposes so just remember that! Also, I really like this a lot and I hope you do too!**

**This is also a ONE SHOT. A very long one too. But yeah, one shot.**

**I'm back on Twitter so please tweet me at: (hereinyourarms_) and if Tumblr's more your thing, follow me (returntomemysunandstars)**

**Thanks for reading and please review!**

* * *

Eli Goldsworthy knew that he wanted to marry his high school love Clare Edwards. He knew it when he was a senior, when they reconciled after their first whirlwind try and after a long separation. Clare told him she was "_all in_" and kissed him breathless. He knew at the moment that he wanted to be with Clare Edwards forever but it wasn't like he was going to propose while they were in high school. He'd wait for the perfect moment.

After Eli spent his first year at New York University, many miles away from Clare, after they spent the year talking on the phone every day, Skyping when they got the chance, and after a few silly fights when they were missing each other too much, Eli was able to go home for Clare's graduation.

Eli was home for summer vacation already by the time the final weeks of Clare's high school career and he took Clare out for her final lunches, picked her up from school, and helped her study for her finals. Then Eli was sitting at Clare's graduation, watched her give the salutatorian speech, watched her walk across the stage and shake Principal Simpson's hand and get her diploma, and watched her smile her most beautiful smile, so proud of herself for this accomplishment.

After the ceremony, Eli waited for Clare to get hugs and congratulations from her family. He saw Clare being held by her mother very tightly and knew that Clare and her mother didn't have the best relationship but they were able to repair their relationship slowly. Clare kept him updated with what she and mother would do together and he was glad to see it in person.

Jake saw Eli waiting for Clare and they acknowledged each other with a head nod. It was funny to Eli that the two had been rivals at first then amicable next and good friends at the end of their senior year, joining together to protect Clare. Jake had ended up not going to university and worked for his dad's construction company. Clare would send him pictures of Martin & Son's projects and even suggested the company to Bullfrog and Cece when they wanted their kitchen remodeled.

Eli saw Clare turning her head to him when Jake pointed her to his direction. Clare excused herself from her family and ran to Eli's waiting arms.

The two circled around slowly, tightly bound together. Eli had held Clare in his arms so many times but this felt like the best of those. Clare stepped away slightly but still kept her hands bound behind his neck. Eli leaned down for a quick kiss.

"I have something to—"

The two of them started at the same time and ended up laughing. "You go," Eli told the new graduate.

"Okay," Clare smiled. "I told you a while ago that I'd tell you my college choice after graduation and I'm ready to tell you."

"Okay," Eli said slowly.

"Well I chose NYU!" Clare exclaimed happily.

"Wait a minute," Eli said. "You—"

"I'll be in New York!" Clare finished for him. "I'm so excited. I know that picking your college depending on where your boyfriend is is completely dumb but I had tons of journalism programs picked out and I applied to a lot and I got into some and I thought of going to TU so I can stay here but then I got into the journalism school at NYU which is highly selective and absolutely amazing and I know I didn't tour the school which isn't the best decision but you love NYU and I could go back with you and tour then, right? Oh my god, you don't like the idea, do you? I know I should've talked to you about it instead of surprising you but my mom's okay with it, Jake thought it would be cool to surprise you, even Adam told me to wait and he kept it a secret and—"

Eli cut her off mid sentence with a toe-curling kiss, leaving Clare speechless afterwards. "Clare, I love the idea," he grinned. "I've met people who go to the journalism school and some of them were able to get some of their work in the Times. It'll be great for you."

"Okay good," Clare sighed in relief. "When you didn't say anything I thought you loathed the idea."

"Well you didn't give me the chance to speak," Eli teased. "But I do love the idea."

"I can't believe I'll be living in New York City," Clare said excitedly. "My first experience away from home and I get to spend it in one of the best cities in the world."

Eli started to imagine his life with Clare in New York. They could get an apartment together, be able to spend the morning, lunch, between classes, and their nights together. They could actually see each other for important days like their birthday and anniversary. It would be like they were married.

Clare continued to talk about the things she was excited for while Eli stared at her. She would be there, he didn't have to miss her, and they got through a year apart. They were already so strong, there was nothing in the world that could separate them. They would be together forever, Eli knew in his heart, so why not make it official?

_Marry me,_ the words were on the tip of Eli's tongue. He'd thought about it seriously a few times. Imagined he would do something special. But here he was at Clare's graduation, knee close to bending and his mind telling him to propose.

"I could make my own choices without thinking about if my mom would approve, I could live my life with no certain strings," Clare was saying. "No expectations, the future unclear and anything could happen. _We_ could just live our lives with no schedule, no phone calls specifically at 10 o'clock at night. That sounds great, doesn't it? Eli, we can just be together! No stress at all. Well, except with school, but at least our relationship would be easier, right?"

And suddenly, the _marry me _was no longer at the tip of his tongue, his knee straightened up, and in his mind, the proposal was pushed far away. Clare wasn't looking to be engaged, obviously. She wanted to have no strings at all. A ring on her hand was a string, a ring on her hand would write part of her future.

"Right," Eli managed to smile.

He could wait for a while, Eli thought. There was no rush. They could finally have an easy going relationship, the first time in the history of their relationship. It sounded nice. Eli laughed at himself at his sudden urgency to propose and tried to forget it as he put his arm around Clare's shoulders and joined her family.

* * *

The second time Eli thought of proposing came when they celebrated their two year anniversary. It was his second year at NYU, Clare's first, and they hadn't been able to celebrate their first anniversary. Their anniversary fell on one of Eli's productions' shows but he managed to plan a dinner for afterwards.

He'd thought about proposing more than usual when their two year anniversary approached. They had a successful two years together, overcoming problems that some couples never encounter, they had kept up with their busy schedules and managed to keep their arguments to a minimum, and they were already living together so it was like they _were_ practically married. But Eli didn't have enough money for a ring yet and he didn't want to ask Cece if she had any sentimental rings that could be passed down. Cece would tell Bullfrog, who'd tell the entire Toronto area by letting it slip on his radio show, then it would travel to Clare's mom and friends, and the surprise would be ruined.

So when the show was over and Eli was done saying congrats to his cast and crew for a great show, he took Clare to one of New York's finest restaurants. He had already pre-screened the menu to make sure at least some of Clare's favorite foods and desserts were there. They had a filling dinner, shared a cheesecake for dessert, and walked through the city to get back to their apartment.

"I haven't eaten that well in a long time," Clare said. She was tucked into Eli's shoulder as the two kept close for warmth in the cold night of spring.

"What? You don't like my homemade pasta?" Eli asked, his voice obviously sarcastic.

"Not when it's what we eat every day," Clare retorted smiling. "Thanks so much for taking me out tonight."

"Hey, we've been together for two years, I should thank you for putting up with me," Eli replied.

"You make it sound like I didn't have emotional baggage," Clare said.

"We've had our share," Eli agreed. "But look at us now. We're living in New York City, we're at university, we have our own place, we even pay bills."

"Ooooh," Clare mocked. "So grown up!"

Eli's smile softened as he prepared himself to pop the question. "We are adults now," he said slowly. "And with two years past us, not even counting when we were together before, we have a stronger relationship than some couples that have been together way longer than us."

"True," Clare smiled.

"So I was thinking that maybe we…" Clare stopped walking, making Eli stop his sentence. She stood in front of him, hands on his arms. Despite having such a fancy dress on under her thick jacket, Clare still looked very young for her age of 18. And suddenly, as Eli remembered that Clare was still only 18, he himself only 19, that proposing now would not be a good choice. They weren't even out of their teens yet! "We could…get a bigger place once we've saved up enough money," Eli said instead. "Despite our attempts to hang up a curtain, sharing our bedroom with the living room is just not working for me."

Clare rolled her eyes and started walking again, Eli's hand in hers. "We'll look for a different place but finding an apartment in the city that isn't going to break out budget is going to be tough. Maybe I can ask my parents to help out. They were asking if we needed any help so maybe they'll pitch in."

"Maybe," Eli replied, his mind elsewhere. Clare bringing up her parents just made him feel even more silly for thinking about proposing at this very moment. They weren't even in their twenties and they weren't financially secure enough to buy a place with an actual designated place for a bedroom. Proposing now would just put more stress on it all. Knowing Clare, even if Eli told her that they don't have to plan the wedding any time soon, she'd start thinking about it too much and stress herself out. Plus, it wasn't like they talked about marriage before. Clare never even mentioned getting married or wanting to.

Now Eli was extremely relieved he hadn't blurted out his proposal.

They finally make it to the elevator of their building and Clare had fallen asleep against Eli's side on their way up. Eli picked Clare up and brought her into their tiny apartment, laid her down on the bed after taking her jacket off, and pulled the covers around her. Eli took in the sight of the tired Clare, who along with taking her classes works as a waitress at one of the restaurants close by.

Eli sighs stressfully, runs a hand through his hair, and goes into the bathroom to get ready for bed.

* * *

The third time Eli thought of proposing was during their first out of country vacation. Eli listened to Clare talk as they sat on a beach, their only surroundings being the sand, the sea, and Cece and Bullfrog a good distance away having their own good time. Eli looked at Clare as she looked up at the sky, sunglasses covering her face, and presumably her eyes closed. She was wearing a modest swimsuit and a cover-up over it. As Eli looked at Clare's exposed legs, he was remembering when Clare had asked him to apply sunscreen all over her skin and how he slowly managed to do the job.

They were on summer break, Eli just finishing his final year at NYU and Clare still with a year to go. Cece and Bullfrog surprised their only child with a family vacation to Hawaii and of course, Clare was invited as well. So far they have only relaxed on the beach but Eli didn't mind. He was enjoying the view and he wasn't looking at the water.

"Eli?"

"Hmm?" he said, taken out of his trance.

"In the future, do you think we'll be like your parents?"

Eli turned his head to wear Cece and Bullfrog were sitting and realized they weren't there anymore. But then a loud shrieking made him see that the two were in the water together. "What do you mean?" Eli asked, making a face of disgust when he saw his parents kissing.

"That happy, I mean," Clare clarified. "They've been married for so long now and they're still always touching and laughing and smiling. Pretty sure my parents stopped physical contact once Darcy left."

Eli moved to lay down on his stomach. "I've said it before Clare, we are not your parents. We're not my parents either. We're just you and me. Sure we'll have our share of problems but we'll be happy. Really happy."

"Okay, good," Clare smiles reassured.

"You know," Eli leans closer to Clare, putting his head on his clasped hands on the sand. "I'm really happy that you see us together in the future. Though I don't want to be like Cece and Bullfrog. I love them but the constant PDA is embarrassing."

"Of course I see us together in the future, I can't picture it without you in it," Clare turns her head to face Eli. "But I do agree. Imagine our kids' reactions if we're constantly going at it."

Caught off guard, Eli's head popped up and he looked at his girlfriend, shocked at what had come from her mouth. A mention of sex and kids in the same sentence even though they had yet to even talk about the future seriously? It didn't shock him that Clare casually mentioned sex, they've talked about it and agreed it'll happen when it does, but they've never mentioned kids. Not even playfully.

"Kids?" Eli questioned.

"Yeah kids," Clare replied as if it were nothing. "You don't want kids?"

"I do," Eli said quickly. "Trust me, I do. We just never talked about it, I didn't know if you—"

Clare sat up and placed a comforting hand on Eli's cheek. "We'll have kids. Just not until we're married, of course." She laughed right after saying the sentence but Eli gazed at her so seriously, amazed that their conversation went from talking about their happiness in the future to having kids. And now Clare mentioned marriage. _We're_, she had said, meaning she wanted to marry him. She was expecting them to get married. And Eli, revisiting the memory of when he last tried to ask Clare to marry him, was more assured this time.

Clare would be 21 in a few months, Eli was already 21, they were more financially secure now than they were a few years back, and Eli finally heard Clare talking about their permanent future together. They wouldn't have to get married right away but to Eli, it felt like the perfect time to propose.

They were on a beautiful island, no one was around, neither of them were stressed, and they were both on the same page about being together in the future.

"Clare, will you—"

"Hey you two!"

Eli gritted his teeth in frustration when Clare looked away from him. Cece had caught her attention with her yelling, inviting them to the water, and Clare couldn't refuse. So Eli grabbed onto Clare's extended hand and followed Clare into the water.

After swimming and laughing and kissing when Cece and Bullfrog weren't looking, Clare left the water to dry off and Eli stayed to float for a little while.

"For someone who's on vacation, you don't look very relaxed."

Bullfrog had swam up to him and Eli continued just to stay still on the water. "Yeah, well I just tried to propose to Clare," Eli muttered.

"You what?" Bullfrog exclaimed loudly. He pulled on his son's hand, causing Eli to sort of jerk in the water, and suddenly they were both on land close to where Bullfrog's things were.

"You proposed?" Bullfrog whispered to Eli's relief. "Did she say yes?"

"I didn't get the chance to ask, Cece interrupted," Eli answered annoyed.

Bullfrog covered his eyes and groaned. "Damn! The timing that your mother has! Well don't worry, we'll find the perfect time for you to propose on this trip. Hey, maybe you can take her back here later tonight and ask."

Eli shook his head. "Clare doesn't like the beach at night time. And besides, getting cut off by mom just shattered my confidence. And I don't have a ring. Cece would kill me if I proposed without a ring."

"If you had told me you were going to propose here I would've brought the ring I gave your mom," Bullfrog said.

"I didn't know I was going to propose, it was kind of spur of the moment!" Eli said almost too loudly and he turned to look at Clare. Thankfully, Cece had her distracted. "We were talking about us in the future and then she brought up kids and marriage and I just thought…"

"Man, that was the perfect time," Bullfrog agreed.

Eli plopped down on a towel and brought his arms up to cover his arms. "I know," he whined.

"Sorry kid. Hey, when we're back at Toronto, I'll give you the ring so you can propose, for real this time, without chickening out."

"I didn't!"

"Yeah, yeah, just make the proposal good. And I won't tell Cece, she'd probably tell Clare."

"Thanks dad," Eli sighed. He stood up from the blanket and went to go back to Clare when Bullfrog stopped him.

"Propose soon," his dad told him. "Before someone else tries to."

Eli rolled his eyes at his dad but when he turned away, his face dropped. His dad was right. They've been together for over four years and if he wasn't going to make it official sometime soon, someone might try to swoop in between them.

He sat back at his spot beside Clare and waited for his two girls to finish their conversation. Once Cece left, Clare grabbed Eli's head to plant a sweet kiss on his lips. Managing to make the kiss last longer, Eli finally pulled away after a good while, realizing he had moved on top of Clare. He was expecting Clare to get all embarrassed about them making out in public but was surprised when Clare pulled him back in.

"I have no idea when we'll have the chance to do this again on a beach, we have to make the most of it, right?" Clare asked, her lips brushing his.

Eli smirked and leaned back in. "Damn right we do," he whispered before kissing her again.

* * *

The fourth time Eli tried to propose was at the worst time. They were back in Toronto where they both had secure jobs, they had a rent house, and they were only minutes away from each of their families. Only a few months after Clare graduated from NYU, the two decided to move back to Canada when job offers opened up for both of them. Also, they were glad to be back home so they were able to attend family gatherings such as the most recent important one: Cece and Bullfrog's 25th anniversary.

It was held in one of the party halls of a hotel in downtown Toronto and Eli would've expected it to be a fancy occasion but it was thrown by his parents so how fancy could it be? It ended up being an island themed party and all of the guests were expected to be dressed casually. He threw on a thin, sort of floral-y collared shirt and his jeans while Clare wore a dress that he remembered her wearing on their Hawaii vacation.

But when they got to the party, they were the ones overdressed. The guests took the theme to heart and there were guys wearing board shorts and a white tank top and some of the girls wore short skirts and even a bikini top.

Thankfully, when Eli saw his parents, their skin was covered up, unlike some of their friends and co-workers. As the party went on, Eli and Adam went to get drinks at the free bar and when they went back to where Clare was standing, she wasn't alone.

Eli watched as Clare got hit on by a guy he'd never seen before. He was tall, blue eyed, blonde, and Eli had seen Clare get hit on by random guys before but this time was different. Usually she would look uncomfortable, she'd be looking around for Eli and run to him once she spotted him, but this time she was welcoming the attention.

"Eli…" Adam said cautiously. But Eli wasn't listening to Adam. He was watching as whoever that guy was went to touch Clare's necklace. Clare still didn't move away. In fact, she looked like she was blushing.

"I'm…I'm out of here," Eli gave his drink to Adam and bolted from the hall as Adam called after him. But he left the hotel and caught a cab to his house with Clare.

He laid down in bed, still in his clothes and shoes, and kept thinking about what happened. Clare had welcomed the attention of another guy, she was smiling at him and didn't even move away. Eli started to think that maybe his attention wasn't good enough anymore. Maybe they were getting boring. Maybe Clare was wanting more or better attention from him. Or maybe she was just getting bored of _him. _They were approaching their six year anniversary and maybe after all this time, Clare was tired of Eli not making any moves to make them official.

Eli opened his bedside table for the ring that Bullfrog gave to him over a year ago. He hadn't found the perfect moment yet with their stressful move back home, finding stability after graduation, it just wasn't time.

But having seen what might happen if he doesn't act soon, Eli put the ring in his pocket.

It would be another hour before Eli heard their front door opening and he ran downstairs to find an angry looking Clare putting her purse down on the kitchen table.

"I can't believe you just left me there," Clare said without looking at him. "You and Adam go off for drinks and then Adam comes back and says you left. You just left! Why would you do that?"

"You were busy," Eli mumbled to himself but Clare seemed to catch it.

"Busy? As in talking to a guy Jake and Glen works with?" Clare asked incredulously. "He saw me, he talked to me, it wasn't a big deal. He wasn't flirting with me or anything, he was telling me something funny that happened on a job site with him and Jake."

Eli felt like an idiot. He had overreacted and didn't give Clare the benefit of the doubt. "He touched you, your..your necklace, he—"

"His girlfriend has the same one," Clare rolled her eyes annoyed. She stormed past Eli, who was still trying to process his own stupidity. "Eli, I really thought we were past this whole trust issue. Just because some guy talks to me doesn't mean all of a sudden I'm gonna run away with him. God, and I can't even believe that you would just leave before talking to me. I'm so glad I brought the extra set of keys with me. And you know, we've been together for years and you didn't even think to just talk to me. That's the old you."

"Clare," Eli finally turned around. "I'm sorry, I—"

"Save it, I'm tired. I'm going to bed."

Eli watched as Clare walked up the stairs. He couldn't believe how juvenile he reacted and he didn't even have a way to defend himself. It was stupid of him to have acted the way he did. They were past the trust issues, they had been for a long time.

Now Clare was angry at him and he didn't know how to ask for forgiveness.

Unless…

Eli took the ring out of his pocket and looked at it closely. Even though it was more than twenty five years old, it still looked like he had purchased it from a current jewelry store. It was silver with a decent sized diamond. It was simple yet elegant and he could see Clare wearing it for years.

Clare had brought up the trust issues, being together for years, and even brought up the old Eli, making Eli feel absolutely terrible, and he knew this problem couldn't be fixed so easily. But maybe if he shows her how much she truly means to him, that he is really _all in, _that he can make a commitment to her, she'll be able to at least forgive him more quickly.

So Eli quietly opened the door of their bedroom to see Clare laying on her side of the bed, facing away from the door. She was still in her dress so Eli figured she wasn't sleeping. She always put her pajamas on before going to sleep, even if she's dead tired.

"I'm so sorry," Eli said sadly. "I…it was stupid of me, I know, and I feel terrible for jumping to conclusions and even sorrier for leaving you there. I don't know why I felt so jealous, I guess it's because I thought you were getting bored of me or something, I don't know. But that's no excuse. I'm an idiot and I do trust you and I love you so much and will you marry me?"

Eli hadn't expected the words to just blurt out of his mouth. He imagined himself being more eloquent and not including his proposal in the midst of his apology. But he finally said the words and he waited for his answer.

Clare hadn't turned around though. She didn't even move. Quickly, Eli got worried that this was Clare's way of rejecting him. So he walked over to the other side of the bed to face Clare but her eyes were closed, mouth slightly open, the face that Eli was familiar with when he would wake up before Clare and spend a minute taking her in before he got out of bed.

Clare was fast asleep already and Eli felt a mixture of relief and disappointment. Relief that he actually managed to say it, disappointment that she didn't hear, but relief that she didn't hear. Now that he thought about it, proposing while apologizing was probably not how Clare pictured getting proposed to.

Eli quietly got ready for bed and took Clare's shoes off before slipping the covers from underneath Clare to place it over both of their bodies. It took a while for Eli to fall asleep, since Clare wasn't curled up beside him, but after an hour or two of being wide awake, Eli felt Clare turning over and curving into Eli's touch.

"I'm so sorry," Eli muttered before placing a kiss on Clare's forehead. Clare still didn't wake up so Eli just made himself comfortable, putting an arm around Clare's waist, and went to sleep.

* * *

When Eli finally did propose, he knew he was ready. It was the perfect moment. It was only a few months since Cece and Bullfrog's anniversary party and after a little time of groveling, Eli and Clare were back in their normal routine.

Their six year anniversary was also coming up soon but Eli didn't want to wait until then. He had the perfect time to do it. Clare had been working on an article that would be on the front page of the newspaper that she was working at and it would be in print soon.

So Eli had managed to get a confirmation from the paper that Clare's article would be running the following day and he set his alarm to go off way earlier than usual to be able to get a copy of the paper before Clare woke up. The night before, he listened to Clare talking about her day at work and excitedly talk about the article.

The following morning, Eli woke up from his alarm and turned it off before Clare woke up. He silently got up and put on some basketball shorts, a shirt, and his shoes and quickly ran to the nearest convenience store.

Eli smiled seeing Clare's name printed right under the big headline. He went back home with the copy and hoped Clare wasn't up yet. When he realized that she was still sleeping, he brought out his supplies.

He placed a sticky note over the second page of Clare's article, neatly folded the newspaper up, and placed it on their doorstep where they always found their newspaper. Finally, he slipped back into bed. Eli waited two hours for Clare to wake up on her own and when she did, he made sure Clare was downstairs before following her quietly.

Eli stood on the stairs and watched Clare squeal at the sight of her paper. She walked back into the house and sat at the kitchen table, her back facing the stairs, and started to read the article.

Being as stealthy as possible, Eli walked down the last few stairs and walked up to the kitchen table standing several feet away from Clare. He brought out the box from his pocket and went down on his knee.

The minutes that Clare was taking to read her article were agonizing. Eli also started feeling a pain on his bent knee. But thankfully Clare flipped the page to the second part of her article.

"'Turn around'?" Clare read in confusion. She did turn around and there, Eli opened the tiny ring box.

"Marry me?" Eli asked, a smile forming slowly on his face.

Right before his eyes, Clare's jaw dropped, she was at a loss for words, she put a hand to her heart and jumped up from her chair.

"YES!" Clare exclaimed. "Yes, of course I will!"

Feeling relief and finally joy, Eli stood up with the biggest smile on his face. He went to put the ring on Clare's finger but before he could, Clare was holding his head and kissing him senseless.

The ring was forgotten for a while as Eli kissed his _fiancé _back with the same enthusiasm as she had. He couldn't help but smile mid kiss, finally feeling the sense of accomplishment. He had attempted the proposal numerous times and he finally succeeded with it. Not only did he succeed with the proposal, she actually accepted.

And now they were engaged.

Clare finally pulled away, her lips red and slightly swollen, and Eli knew he looked red and out of breath. Clare held out her left hand for her ring and Eli smirked as he slipped the ring onto her ring finger.

"I can't believe this," Clare breathed happily.

"What? That I was so creative with my proposal?" Eli asked, wrapping his arms back around her.

"No," Clare said shaking her head. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she admired her new ring. She tried to mimic Eli's smirk before replying.

"I'm surprised that it took you so long."


End file.
